The Foundation of the Friends of Carbon Dioxide

From the valedictory speech of Senator the Hon. Nick Minchin:

I must say that when I first learned of the existence of the Australian Greenhouse Office, I assumed it was responsible for supplying tomatoes to the Parliament House kitchen. But, no, as I soon learned as industry minister, it was in fact a government funded redoubt of veritable soldiers in a war against carbon dioxide. The zealotry and obsessive passion of these warriors in the battle against the apparent evils of carbon dioxide remains a curiosity to me.  After fighting these people for three years as industry minister, I really did wish they would just go away and grow tomatoes.  I am quite surprised and rather disappointed by the loneliness, isolation and indeed demonisation the sadly misunderstood CO₂ is experiencing.  Thus, upon leaving the parliament [wherein Sen. Minchin served since 1993], I am contemplating the foundation of an organisation called ‘The Friends of Carbon Dioxide’. Membership will of course be open to all, including the plants whose very existence depends on CO₂. I think this organisation’s slogan, ‘CO₂ is not pollution’, self-selects.  It has both accuracy and melody to commend it.  I do acknowledge the remarkable power of CO₂.  After all, it led me to have to do something I had thought unthinkable, and that was to resign from the coalition frontbench at the end of 2009—albeit for only a very short time.  CO₂ played a significant part in the demise of Kevin Rudd and Malcolm Turnbull.  It may well result in the demise of our current Prime Minister, so that really is some gas!

I do remain optimistic that one day the world will realise that carbon dioxide is more of a friend than an enemy to the earth’s flora and fauna, and I do seriously believe that, given the extraordinary complexity of the natural forces controlling our climate, which have done so for millions of years, the only sensible policy response to the natural process of climate change is prudent and cost-effective adaptation.